Off late, I’ve developed a new hobby - reading the newspaper. I don’t read it for the news, or even the comics. I enjoy reading the articles just to find a little irony in them. You’ll be surprised at how much irony you can find if you just look. Take for instance I open the paper today morning (the Times of India, Kolkata edition, for the record) and I see right there on the front “National athlete shot at Serampore”. I’m like… “Hmm… maybe she crossed paths with the mafia or something or acquired some sort of steroids” (I know I seem heartless) then I read the article. Get this; she works at a gun factory of sorts. How ironic is that? And to add to the irony, she was on her way to the Cossipore Gun and Shell Factory, where she works. Funny is the way of fate, you get shot by things you make. I wouldn’t be too surprised if the gun that she was shot with was one she made herself. And she’s alive, but not rather happy, apparently. Who would be happy if their own creations come after them? A Frankenstein case of sorts.
The irony doesn’t end there. Oh no, it gets so ironic, anemia patients ten miles away get cured. The headline did mention she’s a national athlete… get this, she’s a gold medalist shooter. Imagine this: Something you do best is fire guns and you make them and you get shot by one. It must be freaky. My condolences to the athlete and I wish her a fast recovery.
Personally if I had control over the entire thing it’d be like she dodges the bullets, as she does in her factory whenever there’s a misfire (watch out Keanu Reeves), and whips a bad boy out and does a one man…er… woman mob hit on the assailants.
Of course, you didn’t notice the article cause the front page is covered with a pic of Elizabeth Hurley and Shilpa Shetty in an extremely awkward shot in mid-kiss (is that what you call those shallow 50 millisecond social gestures?) both looking like Alice Cooper and something about Michael Jackson.
And shallow ‘lil me went through the entire post without telling you the athlete’s name.
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